Scarily enough, it's technically my fourth week of school. I've already been here an entire month. Soon, very soon, it will all come to an end.

Yesterday I had lighting. Today, I had no class. I planned on getting a lot done today, but I was distracted by friends and finished about half of what I'd planned on doing. So it goes. I also haven't finished writing up my art history notes, because I usually do that on Sundays, but this Sunday I spent the entire day asleep, and you can't do much reading and writing while asleep.

I think the surreality of unexpected life moments is dulled if the day has been spent working to the point of exhaustion. Maybe this is why China felt normalized, though upon reflection I realize how weird all of it really was. I had Ameesha and Bree over in my dorm today, and I cooked meatballs and grilled cheese while they chatted. On any other day, this would have been strange. I would have lingered on the image of them at the dining table, talking and laughing while eating out of my family-sized rice krispie bar box. But I am tired as fuck and didn't have any energy to expend on lingering. So the momeny came and went without pause. But I guess it exists here.

Lorawai sent me the contact information of a potential programmer for my game. Like, I literally had no idea who she was, but she's in my lighting class, and we were in the same group for a class activity, and she randomly hooked me up with this dude she works with. It was so kind of her. I feel indebted to her now, even if this doesn't pan out. But I emailed him today, and I really, really hope he comes through. Because if he doesn't, I'm fucked.

Speaking of lighting, people seemed to like my photos. That was pretty nice. Photography is hard, though, and the way we're learning it in this class is so technical. It's hard to hold all the knowledge in my mind concurrently. My low IQ is to blame.

The 48 hr film fest is legit actually happening. I've come a long ways from my fundrager days.

At noon I went to my art history professor's lecture on Natalism during fin de siecle France. Really interesting. There is so much culture behind the randomest, most quotidian things, like milk, or ballet. She talked about the emergence of the welfare state and its role in motherhood and childhood development. Science as the new mother, instead of the mother herself. I'm really glad I went. Yesterday I went to a consent presentation, and it was really lame and boring and I had four slices of pizza, which I regret. Tomorrow there is a humming thing at lunch, and I haven't decided yet whether I'll sounds unusual and frightening and honestly a little lame, but maybe I'll check it out. Maybe humming is meditative, in a way. I guess I'm afraid only of being seen humming while reading. Why does it have to be in the main gallery space? Are we an artwork? Is this a performance piece, and am I an unwitting participant?

I don't have much else to say. I miss B. I miss him more every day. Hopefully I don't regress into an emotional hovel like I did at UCLA, but it's a possibility. Unlikely, though, because I have friends now. Hooray for friends! More distractions, more happiness, more opportunities for social eating!