I went to the MOA with Brian today to help him shop for clothes. It's funny — the aesthetic transformation I enacted upon his wardrobe 6 years ago has made a lasing effect to the point where he basically, to this day, still wears skinny courduroys, flannel, cardigans, and structured miliary jackets. It's so strange how life all comes together in completely unexpected ways. It almost feels like an argument AGAINST planning, because nothing you ever hope for yourself ever turns out the way you expect it to, and envisioning your future does nothing except propel you forward into the untouchable unknown.
This was the first time I've been mall since I started college. And the last time I went to a thrift store was over two years ago, while I was still at UCLA. And gosh, I didn't expect this but shopping feels bad now. Really bad. These trends are so ephemeral, and they're not propelled by people like me, in my demographic, but rather by those younger than me, I think — teenagers on Instagram, or at least celebrities that teenagers follow on Instagram — and the notion of beauty and wealth is so so uninteresting to me, but that's really maybe only because I've never been part of that crowd or good at those things. We went to an Urban Outfitters, and the current style has completely transformed. Everything is normcore, and there was an entire rack of Adidas products, and there are weird, soft pink caps made out of faux leather EVERYWHERE, and there are products manufactured off of Bernie Sanders' image, and $50 vintage-looking Metallica band T-shirts, and miliary jackets that you could definitely buy at a military surplus store for $10 but if you slap a patch or two on the front pockets and your name is Urban Outfitters you can get away with charging $150. Shopping is a truly bizarre experience and while I enjoy walking around malls (everything is so shiny!) I don't enjoy shopping in them anymore.
(I still bought a shirt at Urban Outfitters. It was $20 and has three patches on it. One of them has a picture of a banana on it with a phrase beneath saying "go bananas!")
Brian had to go back for a shirt he saw at Macy's. It was a purple T-shirt with a picture of Mount Rushmore, but instead of presidents it was cats. I'm glad he bought the shirt. Maybe he can pair it with his cat socks. Or, more likely, it will sit in closet and never see the light of day.
We also randomly saw Meg Pawley. That was a slightly uncomfortable experience. I cut the conversation short too abruptly, I think. Brian thinks we saw her beacuse of a divine cosmic pull as a result of our recent discussions on her current occupation.
After shopping, we went back to Brian's house, and I had dinner with his family. They always talk about things I don't know anything about, like celebrities, or contemporary movies, or American history, or history and politics in general — it makes me feel quite dumb most of the time. I really feel like going to MCAD has made me illiterate and conversationally incompetent with the majority of people. I forever wish to be an uncompromising force, but I'm weak and easily swayed by the opinions of others. Do I have a stable core, or am I simply mirroring those who I choose to keep around me? At the very least, I am a liberal.
I watched four episodes of "The Office" with his family, starting with the dinner party episode. That was fun. I love "The Office." Then we went back to my house and watched "The Big Lebowski." The last time I watched it was years and years ago at Alex's house, and I remember it being ok. But I really loved it this time around. Brian and I were inspired, and he said he would make a movie with me — he will write, I will direct. Can you even imagine — if both of us live and work in New York, and then we make a movie, and we also make little indie games and Twines on the side...Carlos will certainly (if he is still firmly planted here) kill himself. Speaking of, they left for Italy today. I hope they come back with interesting stories. I also hope they don't die in an earthquake.